[ Lone Star Con Home ]
[ Domino Logo ]
Previous Story
Next Story
LoneStarCon2 · The 55th World Science Fiction Convention · Monday, September 1, 1997

All Knowledge Hypothesis Founders in Subterranean Investigation

Richard S. Russell

Issue Nine

Thanks Y'all

Sunday Night's Parties

Fashion Notes: Best Hat

Pretty Confused, After All These Years

Art, People and Chili

All Knowledge Hypothesis Founders
in Subterranean Investigation

Why Domino?

WSFS Business Completed Saturday

Remembering the Alamo in SF


It has been said that All Knowledge Is Contained In Fandom (AKICIF). In an effort to determine the extent to which knowledge has been leaking out of the container, we dispatched our intrepid investigative reporter to the depths of the Rivercenter Parking Dungeon. Here's what he found.

Reassuring news first. Not ten minutes had elapsed before a pair of hotel employees politely asked our reporter if they could be of assistance. So people wandering around the dungeon eying up the cars and trucks are noticed and their intentions promptly ascertained.

Of the hundreds of vehicles parked there -- most presumably driven in by fen -- only four had personalized plates related to SF: SFREADR, SF FAN, NCC 1, and PSICORP. Two others had generic-literacy plates: READBKS and AUTHOR. Evidence that at least some fen have lives outside of fandom were MYSTRY, QQS QQS (the rhythm of the rumba), HTFLSH, and BRKNRUN (which our crack cryptography crew is still subjecting to intensive analysis).

There was a similar dearth of SF-specific bumper stickers, even if we count such generic appeals to literacy as "They got the library at Alexandria; they're not getting mine!" and "Fight Prime Time -- Read a Book." "If I were in an F-16 I'd be home by now." had a nice techy ring to it, but another sticker on the same bumper touted the US Air National Guard, so it's at best a case of divided loyalties. And the environmental appeal of a seal pleading "Save the baby humans" is no longer obviously the province of alternative realities.

Subfandoms didn't fare much better. Media fandom was represented only by "X-Phile", "Human by Birth: Klingon by Choice", and "Lowlander: There Can Be a Few." The realm of fantasy, with its links to the Society for Creative Anachronism, showed up as "Heralds do not pun; they cant", "Practice safe government; use kingdoms", and "Member: Miskatonic University Alumni Association."

The Lovecraftian connection of Miskatonic represented the sole theme that could be said to be recurrent, as it popped up in the bumper stickers "Cthulhu for President -- Why settle for the lesser evil?" and "Cthulhu Saves" as well as in the roster of fishlike medallions: Darwin 4, Jesus 2, Cthulhu 1 (but it was by far the most interesting looking fish). Finally, computer loyalties were represented thusly: Macintosh 5, OS/2 0, Unix 0, Windows 0, DOS -1.

On the basis of this highly scientific survey, it seems that, if it was ever true that AKICIF, we're doing a good job of keeping it there.

Previous Story Next Story